Monday, February 7, 2011

The Finishing Kick (Not Really)

Sunday, the shocking news was released to the world in Nick Cafardo's baseball notes. "He had some lingering hamstring injuries this offseason and may be slowed up a tad to start spring training." The "he" in question (Bill Parcells might not have used that word), of course, is JD Drew. Cafardo also elaborated on Drew's "indications" last spring training that he might retire after the 2011 season, saying that he "backed off when he felt healthy" last year. Amidst an ankle injury in September, Drew told that he still might retire. Cafardo must have missed that.

But then again, only How Youz Doin Baseball will give you up-to-the-minute JDtirement updates on the man who holds the rugged distinction of second highest OPS of all AL outfielders in 2009. HYD is also the only source on the Internet that has already gone through his game logs and counted the number of ground outs he's hit to the right side.

It's good to know that JD is already setting himself up for finishing his baseball career with a bang, already complaining about a sore hamstring the first weekend of February. Really the confounding part is that the hamstring that has bothered Drew is the left one. He uses his right leg to drive his truck out to hunting trips. I have a chronically tight right hamstring resulting from way too many trips up to Maine to visit the Franchise without cruise control. Not sure Drew's excuse.

ALSO, I have to talk about the baby sparrow. We have seen Arod as a guy who has claimed people dislike him because he's good-looking and biracial. We've seen him insult Jeter in Esquire Magazine, slap a ball out of a guy's glove, yell "mine" at an infielder, opt out of his contract during a clinching World Series game, blame his cousin on his steroid use, tan shirtless in Central Park, kick field goals and presumably body fluids through the Strahan-size gap in Madonna's teeth, have himself drawn as a centaur, and kiss himself in a mirror. But the fact that he had Cameron Diaz feed him popcorn during the Super Bowl, while obviously knowing in advance that he was on television, might be among the worst. I really wish he had instead requested that Cameron pre-chewed the popcorn for him, spitting the chewed-up popcorn into his mouth like a mother bird does to a baby sparrow (this is a Crank Yankers reference). Disgusting.

The fact that Pat immediately texted me the following immediately after the incident makes it more dumbfounding: "I love him more and more with every passing moment."

In all seriousness, though, is this what New York baseball fans are like nowadays? If Gisele were feeding Brady popcorn during the NBA Finals, Boston would be CRUSHING the guy for being whipped, a woman, or worse. Boston would have the smoking gun of why Brady hasn't won a Super Bowl since getting married - because he is no longer capable of performing basic human functions.

Only reason Arod should have food fed to him would be if that truck on Newbury Street in Boston were actually going 50 MPH.


Anonymous said...


With the exception of the tolls, driving through 295 in Portland, and the Freeport/Brunswick area, you should be able to stay on cruise control for almost the entire time you're in Maine.

Also, New England sports fans do give Tom Brady a lot of heat for his hair, his boots, his cologne, and the fact that he has more of a life than he did six or seven years ago. I'd be very surprised if New Yorkers weren't giving ARod the same type of heat. Also, Cameron Diaz is older than ARod. Not saying she's not an attractive woman, but come on now. Between Madonna and Cameron Diaz he's looking at 90 years of woman.

Lastly, but most importantly, I was sad to read yesterday's post. You guys have done a great job with this thing and it's one of the few websites I check out every day. If this is the last year you do it, I'm looking forward to getting after it.

--the Gunn

the gm at work said...


The 1998 Ford Contour didn't have cruise control. Either way, by the time her junior year rolled around, I was stopping at Kennebunk every single time just to stretch.

Maybe you're right about most New Yorkers crushing Arod like we crush Brady. But Pat's not doing that. Small sample size, but there's not much I can do about that.

Regarding yesterday, it's not going to change THAT much. Only a little bit.

Ross Kaplan said...

I for one certainly don't share Pat's take on the Sparrow Incident. I am now convinced that A-Rod purposefully acts like a complete joke in public just to see how the general public will react.

The guy was sitting in Jerry Jones' luxury box at the SB next to the Bush's and John Madden, so he absolutely knew he was getting on tv. He probably planned this whole thing ahead of time with Cameron. If there's one thing this NFL season taught us it's that you'll get the strongest reaction from people if you either torture domesticated animals or you degrade women and I guess Jones doesn't allow dogs into his stadium.

Patrick said...

most importantly, if a player's performance doesn't suffer, why does any of this matter? brady just won a unanimous mvp and a-rod has played some of the best baseball of his career the last two years (not in terms of numbers, but in terms of making plays when it matters most) leading the yankees to a world series. sure, it's fun to bust chops, but why would i seriously care about cameron diaz feeding him popcorn?

further, these situations are different. brady catches heat because he is supposed to be the #1 in new england, any sport. fans want him to be the quintessential guy's guy athlete that they can root for, and since he was absolutely this early in his career, his recent foray into, dare i say, old a-rod-esque styles and activities makes it a little tougher to accept. but to say all of that is background fodder is one of the great understatements of our time. real patriots fans don't care if he does any of that stuff as long as he plays like he did in 2010.

a-rod has gone in the opposite direction. he played a great majority of his career worrying about his image and doing bizarre things that all centered around a seriousness he seemed to have about himself. this may have contributed to the tightness he felt in new york (he crushed it in seattle in the big spots) in the big spots. his focus and preparation on the field was described by those around the team as unmatched, but he seemed to carry that around in all areas of his life, which again involved a lot of strange events to put it mildly.

now? he doesn't have a care in the world, and hasn't for almost exactly two years (since his PED usage came out). i don't know what changed, or why it changed, but he turned the most difficult experience of his career into a total positive by just being looser. not surprisingly, you have spun it that he obviously knew the exact moment that a fox camera located on the other side of the field was going to not only film him, but that the producer was going to choose to use the shot during the game. and therefore he had cameron feed him popcorn at that exact moment. putting the teenage gossip nature of this entire conversation aside, do you understand that is perhaps the most patently ridiculous, least credible, and meaningless accusation that has been made in the history of this blog? i guess in one sense, at least it's good you are starting year 5 off with a superalitve. or what are you going to tell me, that of course he didn't know exactly when, but since it's reasonable that he would be filmed at some point, that he should never let anything as harmless as his girlfriend feeding him popcorn happen for the whole game?

the only reason i'm even entertaining this discussion is because it is relevant to his play i think. the reality is just the opposite of what you are saying. the old, attention grubbing a-rod, would have been worried about possible negative reaction to such a shot, or how to get himself involved with a better one. now he just doesn't care. having his girlfriend feed him popcorn is harmless, has absolutely no impact on anything, and he knows it. so he doesn't care what people are going to say about it. the fact that an A-list movie star was feeding him popcorn at the super bowl is both ridiculous and funny. the ridiculous element is what i really love, because the more ridiculous it is the further proof that he's carefree. and it's been an absolute pleasure to watch a player of his talents play carefree baseball the last two years. give me more hudson or diaz moments any day of the week if those are going to be the results, which is all i care about.

gunn, madonna is old, no question. but cameron is 38, he's 35, so they are pretty much right there.

Patrick said...

ross, if that is really what a-rod is doing (which, to say the least, i think is a stretch), then that's a beautiful thing. the idea of him purposefully toying with the public/media, because he is no longer concerned with the reaction, in addition to being funny, would show just how far he's come in terms of not taking himself seriously. translating that to the diamond, being in that mindset has to make it a lot tougher to play relaxed and confident baseball, something he's been doing exceptionally well for two years now.

gunn -

it will be changing THAT much for me. no way i'm posting as regularly as i was, and that was already on the decline. so i agree, let's make it a good one, especially in the comments.

Anonymous said...


Exceptional comment. Well written, outrageous, but still on the fringes of possible. That's when you are at your best.


Couldn't agree more on your first point- if they get it done on the field, who cares (oh wait, DV does).

However, on the Diaz front, if A-Rod is 35 and a millionaire man times over (as Whit would say), he could probably do well in the 25-30age range as well, which makes you wonder why 38. Maybe they are on the same intellegence level/emotional wavelength.

Anonymous said...

*should be "many times over"

TimC said...

Would like to add that although Brady played well in 2010, his play in 2011 was shocking.