Thursday, February 3, 2011

Dear Andy,

You ain't made up your mind, I hope you have the chance
I ain't mad, I just think it's f***ed up: family or your fans?
If you didn't want to decide before the free agent period was over,
You didn't have to, but now you got us stuck with Ivan Nova
That's our fourth starter now, man, and that Burnett has blown
While you figured out on your own, we got Bartolo Colon

That's pretty s***y man, you took your sweet-ass time last year
You weighed your pros and cons and decided that you care
I ain't that mad, I'm just afraid when you're not here
Remember when you played in Houston, when your career
And your family life, they could coexist in a way
And you wouldn't have to be here always either
You could split time between your wife and Jeter
Can you relate to all the times I need to see ya
'Cause I'm gonna have a s***y day if we pitch Freddy Garcia
But now I don't have s*** else, you had all year to make a choice
But our rotation will be more wretched than Suzyn Waldman's voice

Sometimes I like to cut myself to see how much it bleeds
Between Jeet and Soriano, Hank's not listening to me
See everything you say is real, and you deserve the Hall of Fame
And people who thinks you took drugs more than twice are f***in lame

'Cause they don't know know you like I know you, Andy, no one does
They don't know what it's like to have Sergio Mitre starting games
Please reconsider, man, it'll be the finest job I'll ever lose
Sincerely yours, Cash, P.S. I'm gonna miss your five rings, too.

Check out last year's.


Anonymous said...

I'm actually surprised he's retiring because I think he's got more than something left in the tank. What does anybody else think?

Also, who do the Yankees target now?

--the Gunn

the gm at work said...


I think it's February 4th. Oh my goodness goodness gracious.

I can give you a list of guys the Yankees CAN'T target because they signed with other teams Pettitte took his sweet-ass time making this decision.

John said...

Thought this was a pretty good article. I'm sure most of you have already seen it.